After years of chaos, living in tiny spaces, moving from one side of the country to the other, and overcoming job losses, just recently I have been feeling like I have been finally getting my life back in order, and it feels really good.
The house is more organized, I am keeping it cleaner and the clutter is less. I have gotten pictures up on the walls, the kids are back in school, I have shed some weight from the past couple years. I was just thinking to myself, things are going good. I got this!
I even had a fun trip with my mom and sisters to Chicago. We had a great time playing tourist and gathering with more family that live here in the Midwest.
I can honestly say it has been years of just trying to keep my head above water. They haven’t been the worst, but it has been challenging. Thank goodness, I am able to keep a good perspective and have a good attitude… most of the time.
Just as I am getting things together in my life, our van is deciding to fall apart. Age has caught up with it. First our drivers side mirror started drooping, having lost some bolts somewhere between here and Tennessee. It is currently Gorilla Taped in place.
Shortly following we started having weird electrical issues…. Dash lights going out, warning lights coming on, blinker not working, radio pooping out, electric doors, mirrors, one window, dome light, all have gone out this summer. This week the latch to open the back hatch just snapped and no longer works. Since our van is 14+ years old, they stopped making some of the parts that we need to fix the electrical problems. We attempted once to get it fixed, they found the part at a salvage yard, and I guess this is a common part to go out. The “new” part was also bad. UGG! Thank goodness our blinkers were able to be remedied with new fuses (crossing fingers it doesn’t keep shorting out). The rest, no luck. But the old Toyota still runs strong. Hoping it doesn’t completely fail us before we can save up enough to get a new car.
Then it was my daughter. She is having a terrible time adjusting to her new school and teacher. She has been begging me to stay home. When she realized that wasn’t going to happen, she started begging me to come to her school and teach her. Her teacher has gotten after her several times and she feels singled out, and un-liked by her We have some things to work through and I hate to see her have so much anxiety about going to school. Up until now, she has always loved school.
Then my body decided to get funky on me. It started with nausea. It might have been vacation food catching up with me, from my families visit. For two weeks I had that horrible sick feeling, the feeling I usually get when I am pregnant, the feeling of wanting to throw up all the time. The feeling that stops me in my tracks and slows everything down. The house goes to pot, and I get behind on cleaning and only do the most vital tasks.
One night I was awoken with a horrible pain under my ribs. It started in the front then moved to the back. I stirred in bed, in too much pain, paced my room, attempted to make several trips to the bathroom. Then the pain was accompanied with horrible nausea, which was followed by violent throwing up. I thought maybe rolling my back out on a dense foam roller would help things, and it did loosen up my back, but the pain in my front didn’t decrease, and the nausea was still terribly intense.
The pain was comparable to being in the final stages of labor, a 9+ on the pain scale. I thought, maybe perhaps I was pregnant and I was miscarrying or it was an ectopic pregnancy. Or the other alternative was my gallbladder. I had two gallbladder attacks seven years ago, while on a cruise. It was the worst pain, next to labor, I have ever experienced. Whatever was causing the pain, it had to stop. After two hours of agony, I finally decided it was time to go to the hospital, even if it was just for pain relief.
The hubs carried all of our sleeping children to the van and we headed to the nearest Emergency Room. It was around 3am by the time we got checked in. The hospital was quiet and the waiting room was empty, they were quick to get me settled and I was so happy to find out what was going on with me.
There initial thoughts were kidney stones, but the first test they ran was a pregnancy test just to rule that out before they pump me full of pain meds. Not pregnant. In with the IV and pain and anti-nausea meds. The next task, a CT scan to see what is going on from the inside. They offered a wheel chair, but it felt better to walk. Once we arrived to the radiology room, violent throwing up started back up. I asked the nurse if the meds should be kicking in, and she thought they should have by then, but I couldn’t feel any relief yet. So on the table before my scan she gave me another dose of anti-nausea and checked with the doctor for more pain meds.
I opted for the wheel chair ride back to my room, mostly due to being completely exhausted and fear of throwing up more.
Eventually the pain meds kicked in enough to take the sharp edge off. Not pain free, but I could at least breath easy and relax enough to get some rest.
After some rest the CT scan had been read and the results showed a gallbladder full of old stones. They concluded that I was having a gallbladder attack, as I had suspected. They recommended that I get it removed soon to prevent more attacks.
Just this week my midsection has finally been feeling less tight. Cramping and nausea has decreased and I finally have a bit more energy. Tomorrow is my first time under the knife and will be getting my gallbladder removed. Wish me luck!!
I look forward to getting back to that happy place of feeling like things are coming together again!
Happily resting and recovering!!